On January 20th, Donald J. Trump did what many older New Yorkers do: he retired to Florida. Melania Trump, god bless her, went with him. Less than 24 hours later, I asked the former first lady if she had time to chat about the last four years. She immediately agreed because, well, what else is there to do in Florida?
Bea: Thanks so much for doing this with me, Melania.
Melania: Yes, of course.
Bea: I want to start off by genuinely thanking you for your service as first lady of the United States…
Melania: Thank you.
Bea: I know you hated it… but you at least tried… and there’s really no shame in trying something new, am I right?
Melania: [silence]
Bea: Like, at least now you know you’re not good at it…
Melania: [silence]
Bea: It’s hard to try new things. I tried tap dancing for a whole week once…. So, I know.
Melania: Yes, it is hard…
Bea: But you know what? It takes guts to try and fail so miserably in front of the entire world, and also show no emotion while doing it.
Melania: Yes.
Bea: And seriously, what a unique story you have… You went from young model to First Lady of the United States in the span of one marriage…
Melania: Yes, I worked really hard…
Bea: So then what advice would you give young girls in America who just want to be models?
Melania: [short pause] I would say to just keep modeling.
Bea: [nods in agreement]
Melania: [silence]
Bea: Tell me something, during your time in the White House, as you were trying to do important work, did you ever look at Ivanka and not think: I hate that biatch.
Melania: No.
Bea: I get that… I would also dislike the daughter of my husband if I knew she was Ivanka.
Melania: [silence]
Bea: So now that it’s all thankfully over, what’s next for Melania Trump? Will she hire someone to write her book? Or will she write it herself in one of the languages that she does speak?
Melania: I won’t be writing any book for now.
Bea: Fair enough… and listen, I don’t know if you’ve been asked this question a lot like Michelle Obama was at the time but… will we see you run for president now?
Melania: [silence]
Bea: Well, whatever you do next, I personally wish you all the best. I genuinely believe you can’t possibly be any worse than you were at your first lady role so… there’s no other way but up.
Melania: [silence]
Bea: Take care now.
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