Brad Pitt has been the subject of intense scrutiny lately, ever since the world found out he’s been dating an Angelina look-alike that’s half his age. So I sat down with the actor at a photo studio in downtown L.A. to talk about what’s been going on with him. Here’s everything that happened:
Bea: Thanks for doing this with me, Brad.
Brad: Sure.
Bea: I really wanna thank you for being on time… and then for agreeing to wait 45 minutes outside so you and I wouldn’t be photographed coming in at the same time… I just didn’t wanna give the paparazzi the wrong idea…
Brad: Right.
Bea: And, you know, I also want to apologize… I thought my team gave you an umbrella or something when they asked you to wait outside in the rain for so long.
Brad: [silence]
Bea: I want to make clear that we didn’t hear you screaming that we let you in or you kicking the door because turns out these walls are soundproof… we had no idea.
Brad: Right.
Bea: But don’t worry, I already asked for a towel and a change of clothes for you, but my team informed me we don’t have money to buy any of that. We do, however, have water. Hot and cold. Whatever you prefer. You just say the word.
Brad: [Silence]
Bea: Oh, and a fan that we can place close to you so you can dry faster…
Brad: [Silence]
Bea: Anyway, how are you?
Brad: [shivering]
Bea: You look tan.
Brad: Yeah, I just came back from the South of France.
Bea: I heard. You were photographed there with a mystery lady… I mean, girl.
Brad: Nico. Yeah, she came with me to the Chateau Miraval.
Bea: Well, you’re a lucky man because she is… breathtaking. Do you know if she’s had any work done?
Brad: No, of course she hasn’t.
Bea: So that face is … all natural?
Brad: [silence]
Bea: And those abs are just… from working out?
Brad: Yes, she works really hard. That’s one of the reasons why she’s so special and good at what she does.
Bea: Interesting… Do you mind asking her what night cream she uses for me? Cause her skin is flawless…. When you see her again, of course. I don’t expect you to text her right now so I can get an answer before you leave…
Brad: [Silence]
Bea: But of course I wouldn’t stop you if you wanted to text her. Right now. Feel free to do what feels right.
Brad: [chuckles] I’d love to find this out for you but she’s asleep. Germany is six hours ahead of us and it’s pretty late there…
Bea: Right! I completely forgot she lives in Germany… How did you guys even meet if you don’t live in the same country or are in the same age group? Did Leonardo DiCaprio introduce you?
Brad: [laughs] We met at a restaurant… in Germany. I travel there a lot to do films and stuff…
Bea: Does Angie know her?
Brad: She knows of her… but no, they have not officially met.
Bea: On a scale of 1 to 99, how much do you think she’ll hate her?
Brad: [laughs] I won’t answer that.
Bea: That’s probably for the best.
Brad: [Silence]
Bea: Well, thanks for coming here and answering some of my questions. And again, I’m so sorry for leaving you out in the rain… without an umbrella. It’s likely it won’t happen again.
.
Read more from Mock Diaries:
—Interview: Mark Wahlberg Opens Up About How His Wife Really Feels About His Muscular Body
