There’s a job opening at Kate Middleton and Prince William’s house! The royal couple is looking to hire a housekeeper at their apartment in Kensington Palace—their primary home in London, where they live with their three children. I had the pleasure of going to the UK to talk to Kate Middleton about what she’s looking for in the person who will fill the role and what she expects from a housekeeper.
Lisa: Hello, Your Royal Highness.
Kate: Hello.
Lisa: [whispering] Do I need to call you ‘Your Royal Highness’ every time I say something? Google was not very clear on that.
Kate: [laughs] No… You can call me Katherine… or just Kate if you prefer.
Lisa: Okay. You can call me Lisa… or Penelope. I always liked that name.
Kate: [laughs]
Lisa: Let’s get straight to business… ‘cause I don’t like how some of your security guys are looking at me… [to the security guys:] You already took everything I have… including my harmless banana muffin that I bought at the airport.
Kate: Oh, that is just standard protocol.
Lisa: They were being unreasonable. Why couldn’t I keep my banana muffin? What was I going to do…. beat you with it? Force you to eat it…? It was expensive. If someone was going to eat it, it was going to be me.
Kate: [laughs] I will ask them to give it back when you leave.
Lisa: Oh, don’t bother… I didn’t finish it for a reason…
Kate: [silence]
Lisa: Anyway, let’s talk about the housekeeping job opening at your house. What are the top three qualities you are looking for in a housekeeper?
Kate: Well for starters he or she needs to—
Lisa: My friend Grace… sorry to interrupt… but I just remembered that Grace likes to clean whenever she gets stressed… You could really use someone like her.
Kate: Uh—
Lisa: Too bad she’s already divorced because when she was going through it she would’ve had your whole apartment in Kensington Palace looking spotless in one night.
Kate: [silence]
Lisa: I let her clean up my apartment a few times… Seemed like a win-win at the time.
Kate: [silence]
Lisa: I’m getting off track, aren’t I? [to herself:] Remember your training. [to Kate:] How many rooms is your new housekeeper expected to clean… four… six?
Kate: Well, we have five reception rooms, three main rooms, a night and day nursery, the staff bedrooms… plus the dressing rooms and the bathrooms… and it’s a four-story apartment … so about 20 rooms.
Lisa: TWENTY ROOMS?! … I mean, twenty rooms? I see.
Kate: [laughs] It is a big apartment, I guess.
[The security guard whispers something in Kate’s ear]
Kate: Lisa, I apologize but we’re going to have to end the conversation here.
Lisa: No problem. Should we meet later then? I’m free all day.
Kate: I’m afraid this is all the time we’re going to have together.
Lisa: Oh… I see… That’s okay. It’s fine. [starts getting up and gathering her things]. Perhaps someone should’ve told me and we could’ve done this over the phone instead of me taking a 10 hour flight for this… but no, it’s fine.
[Kate stands up to see Lisa out]
Lisa: Thank you, Kate. This was… brief.
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