Prince William and Kate Middleton are known for being super nice but also super boring. However, a couple of days ago they did something that made me think they are trying to be a tiny little bit less dull. They went from having ‘Kensington Royal’ as their display name on social media to something more personal: ‘The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge.’
I wanted to know what this big change was all about, so I called their team to set up a meeting with the Duchess. Her staff informed me that she was available to do a Zoom call at 10:15 am London time. I was thrilled until I realized that was 2:15 am Los Angeles time.
Bea: Hi Kate [long yawn].
Kate: Hello. How are you?
Kate: Fine, thank you… we’re stuck doing homeschooling right now. These are crazy times, but we’re fine, thanks for asking.
Bea: Well, it is the polite thing to do. *I close my eyes for a second.*
Kate: *to her staff* She’s awake, she’s awake!!
Bea: Excuse me?
Kate: You fell asleep…
Bea: No, I didn’t.
Kate: You were out for at least seven minutes.
Bea: I was??
Kate: It’s such a relief! For a moment there we thought you were dead.
Bea: You thought I was dead for seven minutes and no one thought of calling an ambulance??
Kate: Well… we wanted to make sure first…
[Awkward silence.]
Bea: Real quick, before I fall asleep again, I want to talk to you about your decision to change your name on social media…. It seemed like a bold move.
Kate: Yes, well, we are trying to keep up with the times. We think it’s important that we stay Gucci.
Bea: I’m sorry… ‘Gucci’?
Kate: Yes. Is that not the word kids use to say ‘cool’? I was told it is.
Bea: Uh… I wouldn’t—
Kate: It was brought to our attention we need to be more ‘dope’ in order to reach the younger generations.
Bea: *laughing* And how’s that going…?
Kate: It’s … a little awkward. Or as kids would say, ‘awks’.
Bea: *laughing really hard now* I don’t think anyone says that.
Kate: I don’t know why you’re laughing… This is what I was told.
Bea: Sorry… *laughs* … I’m done…. *laughs harder* I’m sorry. Thanks for coming… I mean, for doing this.
[I end the Zoom call. This lady is hilarious. I’m crying from laughing so hard.]
Read more interviews by Bea:
—Ben Affleck and Ana de Armas Can’t Stop Touching Each Other and It’s Grossing People Out
—Orlando Bloom Admits He’s Having Problems with Katy Perry While She’s Pregnant with Their Baby
—Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green Talk About Why They Split After 10 Years of Marriage
—Meghan Markle Gives an Unexpected Tour of Her LA Mansion (with Pictures)
