Eva Mendes and Ryan Gosling are one of Hollywood’s hottest couples. So whenever one of them opens up about their extremely private relationship, fans are really happy to hear all about it. My name is Justin Adler and I had the pleasure of speaking with Eva at a coffee shop in downtown L.A.
Justin: Lovely to meet you, Eva.
Eva: Yes, you too.
Justin: Full disclosure, I’m meeting a Tinder date right after this and I need a female’s opinion…
Eva: [laughs] Seriously? … Well I think you look good… your outfit is really nice. Classy.
Justin: Of course it is… I look sensational. What I need your opinion on is this gift I got her…
[Justin shows Eva a fish in a plastic bag.]
Eva: What is this? Eww … is it a real fish?
Justin: Of course it’s a real fish. It’s moving!
[Justin shakes the bag to prove that the fish moves]
Eva: But why? Why would you give a girl a fish?
Justin: What do you mean why?
Eva: Like, is this some sort of inside joke between you two, or something?
Justin: No… This is my first time meeting her.
[Eva takes a closer look at the fish in the bag]
Eva: Then definitely don’t give her the fish. You’re gonna freak her out.
[Justin sits quietly for a few seconds]
Justin: Dating is so confusing these days…. You can’t show up to a date empty-handed, but you can’t just give the girl anything either: flowers are too forward, chocolate is too cliche… So I figured, why not get her something she probably doesn’t have? Like a fish. Everyone likes fish. Plus, they’re dirt cheap.
Eva: I don’t know but… it seems like a really weird thing to give to someone you’ve never met.
[Justin puts the bag with the fish on the floor]
Justin: I totally regret asking you…
Eva: [laughs]
Justin: … but you managed to make Ryan Gosling fall in love with you so… I have no choice but to think of you as my personal Yoda.
Eva: [laughs]
Justin: Small in size but wise and powerful.
Eva: [laughs] Oh, lord.
Justin: What did you guys do on your first date?
Eva: [laughs] You know what? I don’t think we ever had a proper first date.
Justin: What? That’s preposterous.
Eva: The thing is… falling in love with Ryan happened very organically. We had known each other for a while and … it simply happened.
Justin: Sure. Okay. But the only two girls that “I’ve known for a while” are my sister and my cousin Sylvia. And quite frankly, they are both way too old for me.
Eva: [laughs] I hope that’s not the only reason you wouldn’t consider dating them…
Justin: Of course not. They’re also too tall.
Eva: [laughs] Oh, Jesus.
Justin: I just want to have what you and Ryan have: a famous partner that is as attractive as I am. Not more, not less. Is that too much to ask?
Eva: That’s not— Looks are so not important, trust me.
Justin: Says the woman who chose Ryan Gosling as her life partner…
Eva: [laughs]
Justin: Anyway, it appears that our time is up…. and please don’t feel pressured to do this but it’d be really nice if you could keep this fish. Otherwise, I’m gonna have to flush it down the toilet the moment you leave.
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